History/Culture

Single Mothers and Feminism Ruin Children

Single parenthood, especially single motherhood, is a devastating epidemic in the United States. The majority of child abuse perpetrators and welfare recipients are single mothers. Fatherless homes cause delinquency, crime and psychological damage. Mothers are not solely to blame, but their lack of desire to commit to their own wellness and baby daddy is. Now, before you go screaming for the hills, challenge yourself to read through this entire article.

The shocking rise of fatherless homes has precipitated an increase in violence, abuse and crime. Research shows that the absolute best thing both biological parents can do for their children is commit to one another and embrace a traditional foundation for a family unit. This does not necessarily require obtaining a marriage license, so long as an agreed upon long-term commitment between the two parties is established. This is not to suggest that one should withstand physical or psychological abuse in a relationship, but it will require her to take personal responsibility for her actions. The following statistics should be viewed with objectivity and an openness to two-biological parent households.

traditional-family

According to the National Center for Health Statistics, approximately 50% of marriages in the U.S. end in divorce, with nearly 80% of divorces being initiated by women. [1] Despite women predominantly filing for divorce, recent statistics show that more men have been physically abused by their partner than women. According to the National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey created by the Center for Disease Control and U.S. Dept. of Justice, in 2011 an estimated 5,365,000 men and 4,741,000 women were victims of intimate partner physical violence. [2]

rippingcontract

In this same study, 36% of men claimed to have been the victim of sexual violence (coercion, unwanted sexual contact or experiences) by a partner(s) in their lifetime. Regarding psychological abuse, men are estimated to be victimized by their intimate partner equally as much as women. [2] It’s also important to note that men tend to not report abuse as frequently as women. Thus, their numbers will tend to be underrepresented in this and other abuse metrics.

womanhittingman

Single Parent Household

Today, approximately one in three children live with a single parent. This accounts for a staggering portion of society and has incurred horrifying repercussions. The divorce filing stats above clearly indicate single parenthood is primarily the mother’s choice (only 3% of single moms are widowers). Children from single parent households are far more likely to live in poverty, be abused, commit aggression, go to jail, suffer from drug addiction and alcohol abuse, be the victims and perpetrators of sexual assault, drop out of high school, murder, commit suicide, run away from home or be homeless, etc.[3] The list goes on.

juvie

Fatherless homes

Nearly 1 in 3 children never or very seldom see their biological father. [3] Of half the marriages that end in divorce, women win child custody 82% of the time. [4] Children in fatherless homes are far more likely to have behavioral disorders and suffer from anti-social, aggressive, and self-harming behavior. Over 70% of high school dropouts and juveniles in correctional facilities and chemical abuse centers come from fatherless homes. Of children exhibiting “behavioral disorders”, 85% come from fatherless homes and have a greater propensity for aggression. Of rapists motivated by anger, 80% come from fatherless homes. Tragically, nearly 2 in 3 children who commit suicide come from fatherless homes. [5]

To address the narrative of the rampant numbers of “dead beat dads”, 75% of custodial mothers receive child support payments. Mothers are also paid higher rates of child support than custodial fathers. Mothers fail to pay required child support more often than fathers. If one wishes to judge a non-custodial parent’s value based on how much child support he/she pays, then technically there would be more “deadbeat” mothers than fathers. [6]

Child Abuse

Children in households with both married biological parents are far less likely to suffer moderate and severe abuse than they are in single mother AND parent-stepparent households. [7] However, children are 6 times more likely to live with the biological mother than the biological father. Perhaps abuse is more prevalent in single mother homes because the father isn’t there to help share the burden of rearing and providing for the child. As the mother experiences more stress and anxiety, it becomes more challenging to parent peacefully. Even so, about one in five children live with their mother and stepparent. [8] Therefore, one should advocate for both biological parents to live together as opposed to mere two-parent households.

momhitting

A child is more than 8x as likely to suffer moderate or serious abuse in a single parent with a partner household than in a household with both married biological parents. He is more than 3.5x as likely to suffer moderate abuse and 4.5x as likely to suffer serious abuse in a single parent household than in a household with both married biological parents. [3]

The Role of the Media, State, and Culture

Television sitcoms have been normalizing the negative portrayal of men and fathers as ignorant and inept role models for decades (in contrast, from the 1950’s-1980’s, the father was displayed as a wise leader and guide for his family). This portrayal is intended to conceal the positive father figure image. This is the media’s way of normalizing single parenthood and stigmatizing fathers as being unworthy while depicting mothers and women as superior. Fathers are mocked and ridiculed at least twice as much as mothers in sitcoms. [9] With children aged eight to eighteen spending a whopping 8-11 hours on screens daily, it’s no wonder this negative depiction of fathers has been so deeply ingrained in their psyche. [10]

stupid-man-face.jpg

The State has also played a large role in breaking up the family unit. Big Brother has taken the place of daddy and husband by subsidizing single parent households whilst penalizing married households with higher taxes (as they tend to be in a higher tax bracket since they generally bring in more income). Single parent families account for 90% of Temporary Assistance for Needy Families (welfare) recipients. Half of single mothers are on food stamps, yet only 12% of married couples with kids are. [11] It is also worth noting that the rate of children living in single parent households has quadrupled since the 1960s (when State welfare expanded significantly). The poverty rate drops 65% for women who marry the biological father of her children when compared to their jobless single mother counterparts! Alternatively, the poverty rate drops 38% for women who marry the biological father when compared to single moms who work part time. [3]

Welfare Mothers with Their Children on Porch

Leftism and feminism are also culpable for the progressive destruction of the nuclear family. The ideology of “not needing or wanting men” or of being a “strong independent woman” without a traditional family unit is promoted to the detriment of children. The idea that the grass is greener in an alternative lifestyle is delusional.  Enough with the selfish, yet trendy, polyamorous experimentation at the expense of your children! Humans are biologically wired to nurture and foster strong bonds with their own offspring as opposed to someone else’s. The likelihood that your multiple-partners-coming-and-going-in-the-home escapades will crash and burn is a virtual certainty. The chances that you will be poor and on government assistance is almost a statistical guarantee. Neither are empowering to women!

workingmom

In the United States, 52% of people approve of a woman being a single mother and believe one parent can bring up a child equally as well as two parents together. [12] However, nearly 50% of single mother households are in poverty, whereas only 11% of married couple families live in poverty. [10] As cultural acceptance of single parenthood households increase, so too will the number of single parent households increase accordingly. Instead of socially approving of single parenthood we need to actively encourage parents to stay with the biological mother/father of their child.

Moreover, the medical community has shown their bias towards women and mothers in their published research. They have neglected to study the positive impact of a father’s presence in a child’s life and instead focus on the negative impact of his absence. For example, research studies at PubMed on child and adolescent psychology reference “Mothers” over 5x more than “Fathers” and “Maternal” over 16x more often than “Paternal”. Information and research on the importance of fathers being present is relatively absent. [13]

Personal Responsibility

Men and women should be very selective when deciding whom to procreate with. They should do everything in their power, whether it be counseling or other means of self-help, to work through communication and personal growth issues in order to keep their family intact. Practices such as Non-Violent Communication by Dr. Marshall Rosenberg are helpful tools for conflict resolution as they center around empathy and listening techniques. [14]  Finally, we need to hold women to the same standards of personal accountability as we do men. Often times fathers are held up to moral scrutiny (and rightly so) yet mothers are given a pass for their actions owing to their supposed “victim” or “oppressed” status. The double standard must end!

decisions
While abandonment and abuse are cyclical for both sexes, we must break these cycles and give our children the best shot in life. It’s important to consider long-term goals for starting a family and having children both before and during a partnership. It’s better to leave a relationship behind at the first signs of “red flags” before children are brought into the dysfunction. Do consistent self-work to make sure you are in a high state of health and wellness. You and your children deserve it!

successful-family

Although the State makes it much easier to leave one’s spouse, the “safety net” provided is not worth increasing a child’s risk factors for a slew of destructive behavioral issues. The rate at which women leave marriage is alarming, as the vast majority of fathers do want to be in their children’s lives. Although not all single mothers, parent-stepparent, or non-relative households negatively impact the wellbeing of a child, research shows the chances of this being the case are very high. The most stable life one can provide for their child is to adhere to a solid nuclear family structure. Carefully select a mate, do self-work and commit to one another long-term under the same roof. Your children and society will thank you for it.

Sources:

[1] CDC. Divorcesource.com. Center for Disease Control: National Center for Health Statistics, 20 Jan. 2016. Web. 14 July 2017.

[2] Walters, Mikel, Michele Black, Melissa Merrick, Kathleen Basile, Matthew Breiding, Sharon Smith, Jieru Chen, and Mark Stevens. “National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey (NISVS): Summary of Findings for 2010.” PsycEXTRA Dataset (2010): 1-108. Center for Disease Control. Web.

[3] The Truth About Single Moms. Stefan Molyneux. Freedomain Radio, 2015. YouTube.

[4] “Custodial Mothers and Fathers and Their Child Support: 2009.” Custodial Mothers and Fathers and Their Child Support. United States Census Bureau, 2009. Web. 14 July 2017.

[5] U.S. Dept. of Justice. Justice Programs. What Can the Federal Government Do to Decrease Crime and Revitalize Communities? By Jeremy Travis and Steven Rickman. National Institute of Justice, Jan 1998. Web. 14 July 2017.

[6] United States Census Bureau. U.S. Dept. of Commerce-Economics and Statistics Administration. Custodial Mothers and Fathers and Their Child Support: 2011. By Timothy Grall. 2011. Print.

[7] U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. Administration for Children and Families. Child Maltreatment 2007. N.p.: National Child Abuse and Neglect Data System, 2009. Print.

[8] Bureau, US Census. “Data.” Historical Living Arrangements of Children. United States Census Bureau, 01 Nov. 2016. Web. 14 July 2017.

[9] McGee, David, and Bryce Hantla. “The Portrayal of Fathers in Popular Media.” Family Ministry. The Journal of Discipleship and Family Ministry, 09 Dec. 2013. Web. 14 July 2017.

[10] Foehr, Ulla, Ph.D, Donald Roberts, Ph.D, and Victoria Rideout. Generation M2: Media in the Lives of 8-to-18 Year Olds. Kaiser Family Foundation, Jan. 2010. Web. 14 July 2017.

[11] Bureau, US Census. Poverty Status, Food Stamp Receipt, and Public Assistance for Children Under 18 Years by Selected Characteristics: 2016. Digital image. America’s Families and Living Arrangements: 2016. U.S. Census Bureau, 2016. Web. 14 July 2017.

[12] “Mapping Family Change and Child Well-Being Outcomes: Attitudes Towards Voluntary Single Motherhood.” World Family Map 2015. Child Trends and Social Trends Institute, 2015. Web. 14 July 2017.

[13] “Mother vs Father Terms on PubMed.” National Center for Biotechnology Information. U.S. National Library of Medicine, n.d. Web. 14 July 2017.

[14] Rosenberg, Marshall, Dr. “What Is Violent Communication?” Nonviolent Communication: Effective Communication Skills and Communication Training. Web. 14 July 2017.

11 thoughts on “Single Mothers and Feminism Ruin Children”

  1. I could be the poster child for this article. My mother divorced my father when I was two years old to pursue her feminist lifestyle. Of course she was awarded custody by the state, and pursued my father relentlessly for child support for the next 15 years.
    He on the other hand was devastated. He tried for years to reconcile, but mom was far more interested in pursuing a series of “Latin lovers” (all married), one of which divorced his wife to marry my mom. The guy was a total abuser (both physical and mental) and that relationship ended in dissolution a couple of years later.
    Mom turned into a bitter alcoholic, and we lived in relative poverty for several years after that.

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  2. This is such garbage I can’t even handle it.
    The blame put on women in this article is unfounded and insane.
    Oh yippee men pay child support – are they actually fucking there though?
    A father is capable of being present in his child’s life without living with it’s mother, yet they are still supposedly absent in as many cases as you claim. Why are you excusing men for being absent fathers purely because they hand a cheque over every month? Is this not just paying a bill for their freedom from responsibility?
    This is garbage.
    Check yourself.

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    1. The problem with you and most others is that they see themselves as an example of all of society, when you are in all likelihood an exception. Sure, you’ve had a tough road, and you are right, and he is wrong. I get it. But even if that was true (doubtful, since you clearly don’t know how to read or comprehend), that doesn’t mean that all she’s are right, and all he’s are wrong. That’s why we have statistics: so we can say that people do this or that thing xx% of the time. THAT, my dear, is what this article did. You just have trouble accepting facts. Talk to a few single fathers, and you’ll find out that this article is a lot truer than you think.

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